Wednesday, June 6, 2012

the inspiration

I always remember the question that people are throwing at me when I was there with you.
"What is up with the two of you?", I instantly say, "I don't know".
Then after, they will say a lot of things, their assumptions and observations. When I listen to them, they're like poisons to me. I don't know what to absorb and what to let go. 

If we'll have a flashback, I can say that I'm always happy when you are around. The feeling of looking at that door and see you coming in. Or if I may say, when I forget the time that you are coming, I'll just find out that you are next to me. I also remember the little things you do which shows me you care. When my tumbler's empty, you get my water. When I feel sick, you give me medicine. When I'm tired, you give me a massage. Those simple acts that make me happy. 

Simple acts. Actions that are meaningless? I tried to be valiant but I'm such a coward. I wanted to ask, 'what's up with us?'. Then when I'll see you, I'm mum. Sometimes, things are really better by just being them. What they say are true, there should be no expectations and assumptions. So that, you'll not wait for something. Stupid of me to feel different for you. My bad. 

Fast forward to present. I'm moving forward. When I remember those things, they still make me smile. I am very thankful to you. Because without you, I would not feel those things. Thank you for making me feel special. At least once, I've known how to be one.

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